I started to drink at the Old Waterhole pub about a year ago. It is a pub somewhat hidden in plain sight in Mayfair, complete with Victorian brass, mahogany, and mirrors behind the bar. The Guinness was passably good. I was probably in there several nights a week as I was unattached at the time. Putting a brave face on my most recent romantic disappointment, I took little notice of the other customers except for an old man who was always there. What made him stand out was his upright demeanour and obvious good humour, neither of which could be said about the others. At Christmas I got talking to him and confirmed he was indeed nearly 100 years old (he would be 100 the following August) and he was a happy soul.

When August came around, I remembered what he had said and I wished him Happy Birthday. He graciously accepted a drink and we began to chat. After a few moments, having checked his watch he said he was expecting a friend later in the day, he asked me about my life to date and seemed interested. When I returned the question to him, he became evasive, and eventually said he would willingly tell me his story, but was sure I would not believe it.

Well, of course I said let’s hear it. He started slowly, explaining he had a fairly inauspicious start in life. All the time he was at school and college he had had to care for his ailing mother and a drug addicted sister. His confidence was low, and he had reached the age of 30 without experiencing much of what Life had to offer. Both his charges were now dead and to all intents and purposes he was a free agent. He had a good job but always felt on the outside of things.

One day as he arrived home, he heard and then saw a bird tangled up in plastic twine. It was getting dark but he recognised it to be an owl. He was somewhat surprised when the bird swivelled it’s head to look at him. He picked the bird up. The bird did not struggle and he worried it might be so weak it was dying. He quickly untangled and cut away the twine and gently placed the bird back on the grass while he decided what to do. In that instant, the bird flew away. As he looked down the road in the direction the bird had gone, he spotted someone walking towards him. She looked attractive and so he delayed returning indoors. When she drew level, he realised she was downright gorgeous, and was trying to think of something to say when she stopped and addressed him by name. He was astonished as he had no recollection of meeting her before, and he would have remembered. He asked her her name.

“Athena.”

“What” he said “Like the goddess?” She looked at him a bit strangely and said

“You could say that.” She asked him about his life, but never said how she knew his name. Eventually he told her about a girl for whom he carried a torch, but to whom he had never even spoken. Athena looked astonished.

“Why ever not?” He explained he never found to right opportunity to open a conversation. Athena thought about this.

“I think it is your self-confidence needs a boost, not waiting for the chance which never materialises. Where is she now?”

“I don’t know, but she will certainly be in the Tennis Club tomorrow. There’s a tournament.”

“I’ll meet you here tomorrow. Do you play tennis?”

“I do, but I’m not a strong player.”

“There goes your lack of confidence again. Maybe we should enter as a team?”

“I haven’t entered for ten years”

“Time to catch up then. See you tomorrow.” And she walked off down the road. He was still a bit confused.

At one o’clock the following day he heard the roar of a car engine and looking out, there was Athena at the wheel of a red Lamborghini, engine idling noisily. He went out slightly unsure of what was to come. When he sat in, she asked

“Have you ever driven one of these?”

“I have never even been a passenger in one before.”

“You can drive, though?”

“Oh yes, I have a license.”

“Good.” She drove at pace out of town to a disused airfield and stopped.

“If you are not used to these engines, the car tends to spin when you start to accelerate. This is your chance to get some practice in.” and she got out and opened his door. She talked him through it and made him do a start about ten times, until he was confident and perfect. Then, looking at her watch, she said

“We had better head for the Club. You drive.” He gulped. But she had put it up to him and his pride made him do it. He drove slowly at first, and as his confidence increased, he speeded up, and arriving at the club he drove in as if he did it every day. Of course, all the guys wanted to examine the car. Several asked him where he got it and he said it was Athena’s. He also introduced her to those he knew. This created a bit of a stir but Athena made it plain she was with him.

“Where’s this girl of yours?” she said. He looked around and spotted her. Pointing her out, Athena said

“First things first. Let’s get entered for the tournament.” He allowed himself to be marshalled and it turned out Athena was a top-class player and in due course they won the tournament. He was delighted, never having progressed past the first round before. After the presentation Athena went up to the girl in question and started chatting. She was asked about the car and how Athena knew him. Athena said they went back a long way and they were like brother and sister. She called him over and introduced them to each other. A bit later there was a bit of a dance arranged. Athena asked him if he had asked the girl to dance, or meet again, or anything? He sensed she was becoming frustrated and to mollify her he went over and asked the girl to dance. At several points other guys made as if to cut in but each time they found Athena in front of them and couldn’t resist the attraction. As a result, he danced with this girl all evening. By the time came to break it up he had a dilemma. Athena was ahead of him and suggesting as he felt he could start the car without spinning it he could drive the girl home and then drive the car home to his house. Athena would look after herself. He asked he where she lived and got a non-specific answer. However, he was focussed on the new conquest and sallied forth.

Athena turned up the following day again looking as always, a happy vibrant beautiful girl. She caught him looking at her and said

“I’m not available.” Then she said “I have to go to Athens for a week-long festival next week. Will it be all right if I leave the car with you?”

“Well, of course,” he said “Will you be back after the festival?”

“I will try. My father may have other plans for me. I’ve put your name on the Insurance and all the tax and everything is paid but you have to pay for petrol. Have fun, and don’t let the girl get away.” He looked at her and said
“Who is your father?” He had a suspicion. She said

“Zeus, of course.” And she disappeared. She never collected the car, and at intervals over the following years, married to the same girl, he developed a sixth sense for when Athena was around, aware she was checking on him. A few months after his wife died, Athena reappeared. She looked at him appraisingly. Then she said

“Will you marry again?” He thought about it. “I don’t suppose you are available?” She came over and sat beside him. Putting her arm around his shoulder she said “I wish, with every atom of my being I could be available for you. But it wouldn’t work.” She had tears in her eyes.” A little later he said

“Could you find someone for me?”

“Could you not find someone for you, yourself?”

“I could do with some help. You have always helped.”

“There is a classic car gathering in the next county at the weekend. The old Lamborghini is now a classic. Why don’t we take a spin down and see what transpires.” They went down at the weekend. Athena always made him drive. They had a great time at the gathering but he noticed Athena looked preoccupied. Eventually he asked her what was bothering her.

“We are near the coast here. One of my cousins on my mother’s side is causing trouble. I think she wants you for herself. This is a danger for you. She is an Oceanic and will draw you into the water to drown. I will protect you, but there may be a battle. Stick close.” Athena was busy. She was at the far end of the paddock and was gesticulating wildly. After about half an hour she came back but looked exhausted. He helped her to the car, sat in beside her and put his arms around her. She seemed to draw strength from this and when she could speak, she said

“I have dealt with my cousin. I had to tell her I was in love with you. She wouldn’t believe I could be so stupid, but I convinced her. Now I may have to stay here for a long time. Would it upset you?”

“I shall be delighted.”

“It will mean …I must live with you. If I hadn’t persuaded her, she would have taken you from me and I could not bear it. Can we live together?” He still had his arms around her. He turned her face to his and kissed her. She responded enthusiastically, but was crying harder. “It means I have to live as a human until you are old or dead.” He said he thought carefully before he said anything more. When he spoke, he said

“Then kill me. Then you will be free. She stopped crying and said

“You are a sweet man. How could I even consider killing you?”

“Let’s go home and talk.” And they did. They lived as husband and wife with one difference. Athena did not age. After fifty years, when he was ninety, Zeus allowed Athena to resume her normal existence. Each August she visits and takes him to the festival in Athens.

“I can tell,” he said to me “you don’t believe a word of it.

“Well….” I said. As I spoke, a drop-dead gorgeous girl walked into the pub. She walked straight down to my friend, kissed him on the lips, and said

“Are you ready?” He stood up, revealing a weekend bag by the seat, took her hand and they made for the door where he turned, and smiled.

The two of them walked out the door and I never saw either again.

© Dave Cuffe 2025

Athena...

2025